Sarah, 36, and her husband Chris*, 40, had been planning to go to their first ever sex party when the UK lockdown was announced. So they booked in to attend a virtual party from their own home instead. Here, she shares their experience.*
We were supposed to be going to a Killing Kittens mansion party in April – it would have been our first (though we’ve been meaning to go for ages). Since we don’t live in London and we have kids, arranging to go in the first place wasn’t easy, so we were really gutted when the parties were put on hold. But an online party seemed a good way to schedule in something fun while still observing the guidelines to stay at home.
We had no expectations about what the online party would be like, but it ended up being a really friendly environment with only positive and encouraging posts in the chat boxes. And judging by what people were doing on screen, most of the participants weren’t too shy about getting it on with other people watching! Although as with all KK parties, just being happy to watch is also totally OK.
Chris and I introduced ourselves, and then there were the performances. As party members we could do whatever we wanted, and the KK admins would zoom in on certain couples so they’d be the main action on screen (with permission – we had to give ours by clicking a ‘share acceptance’ box). We were chosen quite a few times which I loved since I’m a total exhibitionist!
39 best sex toys ever according to an expert, for every pleasure preference and budgetGallery21 PhotosMy husband was a bit nervous beforehand as he’s a more private person, but once we relaxed it was easy. Everyone was so welcoming and open-minded, it was easy to relax and do things we’d never usually do in front of other people.
It was a great excuse to dress up during lockdown. As I’d already gone shopping for my Mansion party lingerie, I wore that with hold-ups and heels. Chris wore trousers and a shirt, and we both wore masks too, obviously. I even waxed my legs and blow-dried my hair.
It was a really brilliant night and just what we needed. Human connection is what we’re all missing right now. Anything that brings people together when we’re so isolated has got to be a good thing. And if experimenting with your sex life is something you wanted to do then it ticks both boxes. In fact, if anyone was nervous about going to an in-person party this is a good way to try it in a kind of ‘introductory’ way, like dipping your toe in. Having said that, on camera you’re still allowed to get as filthy as you like!
During the party there’s a chat thread running alongside the screen, and users can also message another user individually, though I didn't want to spend too much time typing or else we wouldn’t have been able to either watch or do anything ourselves. After the party we switched to sexting with just one couple, which was fun as they were into the same things as us. We took naughty pictures and sent them to each other, and gave each other instructions on what to do, so there was a bit of a sub-dom thing going on.
All evening, there was never any pressure to do anything we didn’t want to do. I’m a total exhibitionist and very outgoing, but doing sexual things in front of others still feels a bit ‘naughty’, which gives me a rush. And seeing real people in a real, candid home environment was actually a big turn-on as it’s more relatable.
We all need human connection right now, and if I can combine it with some kinky fun to break up the lockdown boredom, even better!
*Names have been changed.
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